Things have been decent as of late. My mood has definitely seen a positive change, and I’ve sort of established a strategy of stubbornness and angry optimism towards this whole morass.
Last week I went to see a neuropsychologist, who ran a number of tests on me and my brain. I have been experiencing and struggling with concentration and memory problems, which both my neuropsychologist and my regulard head shrink explained with emotional stress, which to be sounded very plausible.
I had, however, been experiencing some very odd situations, where I found spelling and grammar mistakes in my emails, which is something I never do. As in _NEVER_. I usually don’t even have to think about these things, as it has always come very naturally to me, and suddenly I start making the most retarded grammar mistakes in email. I must say, that worried me a bit at first.
They decided to run the tests, and they went great. They were a jolly mix of memory tests with numbers, letters, words and sentences combined with classic IQ test material, selecting a figure to follow a sequence etc. There even was a section with abstract drawing.
I fared really well, which made me happy. Both because these kinds of tests are something I would guess I would be very good at, so at least apparently I’m not getting any dumber (not significantly anyways, and not something I can blame the MS for), but also because I can now safely assume that the problems I have been having is mainly caused by emotional stress, as suspected.
So, at least that was good news. For once. I will begin my medication training at the end of this month. That won’t be fun at all, but I guess just doing something to actively reduce the risk of more attacks is definitely worth it. It will involve injecting an almost 2 inches long syringe into my thigh on a weekly basis, so expect some fun images and videos of that.
It is still pretty weird when I stumble into someone I haven’t spoken to in a while, who doesn’t know about my new exotic condition. I usually don’t tell them, since it is not something I wish to explain in 2 minutes and besides, does it matter that much? I would like to think that it doesn’t anyway.
I hope you are all well - I realize that relapses are very common and that a process like this often is 2 steps forward 1 step back, but I can’t avoid being rather optimistic right now about the whole situation. Bracing myself for nasty mood swongs in the next week or so.
Although, I can’t help wondering: Maybe sclerosis really can be red after all.